In September, Jenny lost her friend, Victoria, to bowel cancer. Here Jenny discusses her own breast cancer diagnosis and reflects on The Big Sing for Cancer concert, which raised an incredible £36,000, with celebrity choirmaster Gareth Malone in attendance.
I was happily married and pregnant – then life got flipped upside down
I got married last May and became pregnant in August of last year. Then my life got flipped upside down, as I received a triple negative breast cancer diagnosis in March this year.
I had felt a tingling sensation just above my right breast. I was heavily pregnant and ignored it because I thought it was to do with my pregnant body. But after it happened again the second night, I checked myself and felt a hard, round lump. I almost had a panic attack.
Because I was due to give birth a few weeks later, I went to the GP. He said it felt like a lactating adenoma – just a lump to do with pregnancy. He referred me to the Breast Clinic and they said the same, even after a scan.
I had a biopsy, then returned the following week to be told by the doctor I had triple negative breast cancer. I couldn’t believe it.
Chemo was horrendous but my last scan was clear
A week later I got induced and had a great birth, considering everything. Orla, my baby daughter, did well.
After that, I went straight into surgery, where I got an infection and had to live in the ward for a week. That was dreadful because I couldn’t see my baby.
Then I started chemo – that’s been horrendous. On the weekends, I’ve been going to my mum’s to recover. My husband, Alex, has been unbelievably supportive, looking after our baby on weekends on his own when I’ve been feeling so ill. And my mum, my dad, my sister, they’ve been incredible too.
I want to say to other women, even if you’re pregnant, don’t dismiss lumps and bumps. Fortunately I caught it early, my last scan was all clear, and I start radiotherapy in January.
Vicky was my soulful soulmate
I met Vicky at school when we were 11. We both loved music and were in all the school concerts.
After sixth form, we stayed friends and had so many good times – she was outrageous fun.
Vicky was such a loyal friend and my biggest cheerleader. I’m a classically-trained pianist and song-writing has always been my outlet. Whenever I was low about my music career, she’d big me up.
Vicky’s bowel cancer symptoms started as a tummy ache
She had a tummy ache which got worse, and she ended up in A&E in August 2021. Then they found a tumour. She was told the bowel cancer had spread (stage 4) in March this year – around the time I was diagnosed with breast cancer.
Being diagnosed with cancer and going through treatment can be very lonely, but me and Vicky could relate to each other. One day, when she was at The Royal Marsden lying on a bed with a tube down her mouth, I told her: ‘People don’t see this side of it, and I know the brave hat you’re putting on every single day.’
The Big Sing for Cancer
In spite of everything, Vicky kept doing lots of fundraising. And after I got diagnosed with breast cancer, we decided to organise The Big Sing for Cancer together.
Even up until a week before she died, Vicky was so involved in the concert planning, including sending through her song choices from the hospice.
After she died, we went ahead with the concert to raise money in her memory.
Because I was pretty unwell having chemo, our friends Marina, Kitty and Catriona got on board, they were an amazing team and brought everything together. On the night we also had friends from far and wide helping behind the bar, and collecting donations - we couldn’t have done it without them!
It was a wonderful tribute to Vicky
The concert was really cathartic and the church was full with 550 people. All of Vicky’s friends and family were there. Everyone was up on their feet dancing and everyone said it was the most magical event - a wonderful tribute to Vicky.
We sang a lot of pop classics including Dancing Queen – which was a song Vicky had at her wedding.
I sung one of my own songs, ‘Unknown’, which I had written the previous year for my friend going through a cancer diagnosis.
And I did an acoustic cover of Tina Turner’s Simply the Best on piano, which I dedicated to Vicky and to all the people we’ve lost through cancer.
Throughout, Gareth Malone was the glue we needed. Gareth’s a friend of mine and as soon as I’d asked him if he’d get involved, he immediately said yes. He put the audience at ease, got them singing along and pulled the raffle.
We raised an incredible amount for charity
We raised so much money because during the interval, people could hold out their bank cards and beep the machines to donate. My friend Marina was integral in sorting that out.
On the night we raised something like £12,000, and the final total was £36,000, split between Breast Cancer Now and The Royal Marsden Cancer Trust.
I’m hopeful for the future
I’m 33 now and I still haven’t processed everything that’s happened over the past year.
I’m nervous about the future, but hopeful. I really want to try and organise another concert next year – possibly the Big Sing with Christmas carols. And if this blog can inspire people to do some fundraising, that would be fantastic.